Recently I was told by numerous people about losing my “man points”, so today I want to talk about gender stereotypes. If you’re reading this, you know who you are and the “man points” reference is directly to you. Anyway, lets begin.
To start things off, I will officially turn in my “man card” for a “Jacob Q. Smith Card” because I don’t want to be labeled as anything other than me. Granted, I can be labeled by my interests, but I refuse to let anyone tell me now how to be a man because all that’s required to be a man is the parts. I won’t try to prove whether they’re there or not, because nobody wants to see, and I don’t want anyone to see.
Now that that is cleared up, I’ll tell everyone what I mean. I’m not sure where it all started, but somewhere along the road, someone decided that in order to be a man, you had to be strong, aggressive, confident, the protector, etc. You aren’t allowed to show any emotions, and you have to be logical, and you have to treat everyone like they’re less than you, unless they’re your boss or parents. On the other hand, women are supposed to be seen, not heard. They’re soft, delicate, pretty, houseworkers, and emotional. They’re irrational because of their emotions, and they talk forever, and they talk about stupid sappy stuff like love and relationships. Well how bogus is all of this? I would venture to say extremely. If society wants us to follow this pattern, we’ll end up with programs similar in nature to the Hitler youth. I think these rigid ideas of what men and women ought to be destroyed and certainly not followed. All people, regardless of gender, should try to be more like Jesus in my opinion, and we’re all individuals, why are we trying to make all people the same?
For myself, I have numerous feminine qualities, and I wear them a little more prominently than most guys. I like musicals, I like singing, I love talking about relationships, I like One Direction (sorry, they’re a band and they make music that I enjoy, I don’t care if people call them gay. Technically, The Beatles were a boy band too, and everyone loves them), I listen to a lot of female singers (Carrie Underwood, Taylor Swift, Dolly Parton, Adele, Shania Twain, Avril Lavigne, etc.), I do care about my emotions and I do show them, I’m not a big strong alpha male, I talk a lot when I feel comfortable to, I’m very sappy, I will watch and enjoy romantic movies, I’m not all the aggressive when I meet people, I’m more brain than brawn. And you know what, I’m still a guy. I don’t care what anyone thinks of me anymore. I am who I am, God made me this way and to insult who I am is not okay in my book, or God’s. You don’t have to agree with everything I like and am, but you do have to accept that this is who I am. If you don’t like it, keep it to yourself, and kindly agree we won’t be great friends.
Although, I do have masculine qualities as well. I want to be with a woman when I am older, I like action movies and things where everything blows up, I love Lord of the Rings (which I refuse to accept as nerdy, it’s quality literature and quality cinema. I love it.), I do like outdoorsy things, I like video games, I am very logical, I do play sports with the right people (I never played many sports before because the people were all jerks, or I didn’t enjoy the sport enough to ignore them), and I can be aggressive in certain situations. Maybe you can see my feminine qualities outweigh my masculine qualities. Well, I don’t care anymore. I am a male, and if I am a little more feminine than other guys, what is so wrong with that? I connect with girls a lot easier, that’s for sure. I find it a heck of a lot easier to connect with girls than guys, I guess that will help me out in the dating scene in the future. I don’t completely disconnect with guys, but most of the guys I hang out with are not alpha male cold-hearted jerks. My best friend is a guy, my other close friends are almost entirely female. Sorry, but my guy friend, he’s not a “manly man” either and that’s completely fine with me, I love him anyway and I clearly am not a manly man either.
Now I want to address what I touched on earlier, being more like Jesus. Jesus loved EVERYONE, regardless of gender equally. He wasn’t the manliest of men by our standards, and yet he was the greatest man who ever lived. He was loving, and generous, not enormously big and strong, not cold and domineering. He was compassionate, he listened to people, he told people his feelings without any regret. He never sinned, he was completely perfect in every way, and everyone, men and women, should strive to be like HIM, not society’s idea of what a man and woman should be. If a man wants to be a nurse, or a teacher, let him do it. If a woman wants to be a doctor, business owner, etc. let her do it. Everyone was given talents by God for a reason, and if everyone tries to be a standard man or woman, most of those talents, or at least a great deal of them, go wasted. Strive for perfection, to be like Jesus, though ultimately none of us can ever attain it, not given all the time in the world. Given all eternity, we would all fall short of being like Jesus, but that doesn’t mean we shouldn’t try. Jesus calls us to it, so we should obey.
So you know what? You two people (I’m thinking directly of two people) I will HAPPILY give up all my man points, because quite frankly I don’t want them. I want my individuality, my “Jacob Q. Smith Points” if you will. I will be happier, and I will be releasing a huge burden that has hovered over me for a long time. I, Jacob Smith, am not “man”, I am me, and that’s all I want to be.